何志平在紐約法庭陳情中英全文

如果你在16個月前問我今日會在哪兒,我怎樣都難以料到會是這裡(法庭)。我今年69歲,在中國香港土生土長,一生都在解決分歧和幫助他人。

向法庭提交的眾多求情信令我深受感動。這些信件的撰寫人,在我人生不同階段認識及感動我:包括我年輕時、在接受音樂及醫學訓練時、教學及執業時、在香港政府服務期間、在中華能源基金會工作期間、以及在大都會懲教中心(MCC)時。我深受這些信件感動,並希望這些信件可以讓你了解我的志業和一生,因為相比我現在所說的,它們更透徹和深入。我非常感謝撰寫求情信的人;我感恩,亦是因為讀這些信時,它們重新提醒我過去多年走來的路、提醒我有福氣可以經歷人生這麼多不同章節,而且每個章節都比上一個更具驚喜。

我人生最新一章亦是最困難的一章。有時我覺得我的一生已經完了;連天也已塌下來;我的聲譽、事業、和一生的志業都已被摧毀;我的專業、社交和個人生活的根基全部都被連根拔起。

對於我的行為和境況令家人承受重擔、令身邊最親的人──包括我太太、我的女兒、我的母親、同事、以及世界各地的朋友, 經歷如此痛苦,我感到非常懊悔。他們和我一樣都同受痛苦,我希望對他們逐一道歉。今日所受的痛苦、以及我之所以今日站在法庭,全因我一人的所作所為;我為這些行為負上全部責任,而且我深感抱歉。

我身處世界的另一端,無法安慰我的家人,這令我非常心痛。我太太幾個月前剛剛喪母,而我無法握著她的手,與她分擔傷痛;我的父親亦剛好在兩年前的2017年3月離世。我的母親失去了一位相識68年的摯友,現時92歲的她正獨自居住。我每天都祈求媽媽可以十分長命,讓她再見到自己的兒子回家、在她身旁懇求她的寬恕、並照顧她渡過人生最後的日子。

在外國監獄囚禁超過16個月,對我的心力和信念都是很大的挑戰。我很努力將絕望轉化為有意義的事、嘗試將此逆境和困境變得正面。

在MCC,我和一些我原本沒有機會認識的人緊密地接觸,這經驗令我大開眼界,亦令我對不同事物敞開了心窗。我在MCC每日都和其他囚犯同住和互動,而透過防止自殺計劃,我得以成為一些正處於人生最絕望和脆弱階段的人的伙伴。在教育方面,我幫助了不少囚犯準備迎接相等於中學文憑的GED考試,包括教授地理和國際關係,又和他們分享遠在他方的人物和文化故事。我又和他們討論離開監獄後的選擇,以及有什麼技能可以幫助他們重投社會,例如如何撰寫履歷、準備招聘面試、公開演講、處理自己的財政、管理時間、控制自己的憤怒、以及在衞生相關行業的工作機會。

我們的溝通本來始於互相同情和憐憫,但後來已發展成另一種關係,這關係是源於我們與生俱來互相理解和欣賞的能力,我們感受到的,是彼此間重燃的善良和體面。我們一同找到內在的平安,我們找到力量,我們找到希望和未來的前景。
在過去的16個月,我向他們學習了不少,而透過他們,我亦認識了世界、生命、和人性,尤其認識了自己,我的性格、自尊、弱點和缺點。這個經驗既令人畏懼,但同時充滿驚喜和啟發,無論我到哪裡、做什麼,我肯定都會與身邊和社區的人分享。

法官閣下,我的心此時充滿著感恩。我感謝上天並沒有拋棄我,反而指引我、帶領我渡過這段非常困難又深刻的驚歷。我亦對我的家人和忠誠的朋友非常感激,感謝他們的堅毅、支持和鼓勵。我每日都期盼回家重投他們的懷抱。

我感謝法庭,並感謝陪審團所花的時間、精力和思量,我尊重你們的裁決和決定。
我亦感激MCC的人員和囚友,你們確保我的安全、教導我、並陪伴我;特別是MCC的教育部,你們的預算很緊張,但仍願意花費少量金錢購入幾件樂器,包括一支小提琴。這支小提琴將音樂重新帶到我和MCC很多人的生命當中。
最後,我希望感謝美國人在過去16個月照顧我。我由心底向你們發出摯誠的感謝。

我今夏將屆93歲的母親經常提醒我,一個中國人如果要誠心地表達謝意,就應該向對方鞠躬。法官閣下,請接受我對你的尊重、謝意和感激。

(何志平向法官鞠躬)

何志平在紐約法庭陳情全文(英文原文)

Your Honor, good morning.

I'm humbled to be here.

This is the last place in the world I would have expected to be if you asked me 16 months ago. I'm 69 years old, born and raised in Hong Kong, China, and all my life I have lived to abridge differences and help people.

I have been deeply moved by the numerous letters that have been submitted to you, to the Court, written on my behalf by people that I have known and have touched me at various parts of my life -- from my youth, from my musical and medical training, my medical teaching and clinical practice, my government service in Hong Kong, and my work at the China Energy Fund Committee think tank, and also from my time here at the Metropolitan Correctional Centers, the "MCC." I have been deeply moved by the letters, and I hope that these letters give you a fair sense of my life work and my life, because these letters speak more thoroughly and deeply than I can here and now. And I'm extremely grateful to the people who wrote them. I'm also grateful because reading these letters reminded me of the path that I had taken over these many years, that I have been blessed to live through so many different chapters, each one more surprising than the last.

The latest chapter is yet to be the most difficult one. There have been times when I felt that my life is over; the world around me has collapsed; my reputation, my career and my life's work destroyed; the foundations of my professional, social and personal life have all been shaken and uprooted.

I feel great remorse that my actions and my situation have caused so heavy a burden on my family and have caused so much grief to the people around me and closest to me -- my wife, my daughter, my mother, as well as colleagues and friends around the world. They have suffered as surely as I have, and I want to apologize to each and every one of them. The actions that have caused this suffering and has brought me to this courtroom today were mine and mine alone. I accept full responsibility for them, and I'm deeply sorry.

In particular, I have been half the world away, and not able to comfort my family gives me great pain. My wife had just lost her mother several months ago, and I was not there to hold her hand and to share her sorrow. I myself lost my father exactly two years ago, in March of 2017. And my mother has lost her mate of 68 years. My mother, who is now 92 years old, has been living alone. And I pray every day that my mother should live a very, very long life so that she can see her son coming back to her side to beg for forgiveness and take care of her the remaining days of her life's journey.

Being incarcerated in a foreign jail for over 16 months has really tested my inner strength and faith. I tried very hard to transform despair into something meaningful, to make something positive about this adversity and predicament.

At the MCC, I had come into close contact with people that I did not know and would not have met otherwise, and this experience had opened my eyes, my mind, and my heart to a lot of things. At MCC, I lived among the inmates, interacting with them very closely every day, and through the suicide watch program I provided companionship to many of them who were in the most desperate and vulnerable moments in their lives. And in the education department, I worked closely with many of them to prepare them for examination leading to the High School Equivalency Diploma, the "GED," by giving classes about geography and world relations, telling them stories of faraway places, people, and culture. And I also held discussions with them on the various aspects and options at the end -- they could consider at the end of their incarceration, including discussions on various skill sets that could become useful to them upon reentry to society, such as how to write a résumé, how to prepare for a job interview and speak publicly, how to handle one's financial affairs, and about time management, anger management, and about opportunities in working in a health-related environment.

Our communications originated from mutual sympathy and commiseration, but later on developed into something that was based on the innate ability to understand and appreciate one another as human beings, what we felt and saw between us, which is simple human kindness and human decency we were able to rekindle in ourselves and in one another. Together, we found peace, inner peace. We found strength. We found hope and promise for the future.

Over the course of the last 16 months, I've learned so much from them, and through them, about the world, about life, about human nature, especially about myself, my own temperament, my pride, my frailties, and shortcomings. It has been such a daunting and yet surprising and enlightening experience for me that I'm certain that no matter where I go, no matter what I do, I will be sharing myself and my life experience with those around me and in my community.

Your Honor, at this time, my heart is filled with gratitude. I'm thankful to the Almighty for not forsaking me, for guiding me and leading me through this very difficult and profound experience of a lifetime. I'm also very thankful to my family and also thankful to faithful friends for binding with me, for their steadfastness, and supporting me with encouragement. I'm looking forward every day to my coming back home to them.

I'm thankful to the Court and to members of the jury for your time, your effort and consideration. I respect your judgment and decisions.

And I'm thankful to the officers and inmates at MCC for keeping me safe, for keeping me educated, and company, and especially the MCC education department for squeezing from their already tight budget a small provision to procure a few musical instruments, including a violin. The violin has brought music back to my life and to the life of many at the MCC.

Lastly, I would like to thank the American people for taking care of me for the last 16 months. So, to all of you, a very sincere gratitude from the bottom of my heart, and I thank you all very, very much indeed.

Also, my mother, who will be 93 years old this summer, has always reminded me that to convey gratitude in the most sincere way, a Chinese gentleman should take a bow. Your Honor, please accept this token of my respect, my gratitude, and my appreciation.